Jam Session – Friday, June 10, 2022

Clarity and Compromise

There can be times when we feel like someone is interfering on our plans – the boss that tells you no to your PTO, the friend that jumps on your vacation plans, that annoying coworker who keeps stopping by your desk to discuss the same fight she has every morning with her kids, the dog that just pooped the house when you’re already 5 minutes late to work….

The list is endless! I’m even certain that you came up with your own scenarios as well. In all of these situations, I want you to remember that no one is doing anything to you. It takes courage to be clear and upfront about your desires, and it takes compassionate understanding to compromise. Both will help remove you from the stuck feeling that things are happening to you, and will give you back the autonomy to make informed-choices.

To the boss that tells you no to your PTO: I’ve been feeling burnt-out lately, and will be taking the space to relax. How might I be able to support you before I leave for vacation?

The friend that jumps on your vacation plans: I planned this as a solo experience, but if you’d like, I encourage you to plan a gathering for us, and I’ll let you know if it works for me.

That annoying coworker who keeps stopping by your desk to discuss the same fight she has every morning with her kids: I’m sorry you’re going through it right now. I really need to complete my work right now, but let’s sit together at lunch for 10 minutes and think through a game plan, because that seems to happen often.

The dog that just pooped the house when you’re already 5 minutes late to work: Hey, I’m really sorry I am running late. My dog had an accident, and I need to get them settled. Would you let my client know I’m running 10 minutes late?

It takes nothing to be kind and consider you may be inconveniencing those you love with your demands. Everyone grows at their own pace. Invite clarity and compromise into your next difficult conversation, and you will invite truth and peace into the relationship.

A Prayer

Father God,

Thank you for blessing me with the free will to be able to make the best decisions for myself in the moment, and thank you for the wisdom and guidance through your word. Lord, help me to approach difficult conversations with truth, honesty, and clarity, and bless me to be receptive when others are expressing views that go against my needs in the moment. Give me your strength to not take those moments personally, and to work best to find a compromise when necessary.

In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Mood Music

There’s no way that we can work it out
If we don’t pull together
I don’t mean to be demanding
I want some understanding

This song helps me address the point that some issues do not require compromise, they require an ending. If you feel you have done all that you could, and there’s no more, then allow space and time to do the rest. Don’t burn yourself trying to keep you both warm.

Until Monday.


Published by Jam

I'm on a journey towards a better understanding of self through written reflections on my romantic relationships, situationships, entanglements, and complicated friendships.

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