Jam Session – Monday, June 13, 2022

What is Maturity?

The buzzword this week has been maturity, so I know this season of rapid growth that I’ve been reflecting on is somehow related. According to Webster’s, mature is defined by having completed natural growth and development, or, related to being an older adult.

If maturity is the quality or state of having completed natural growth and development, then I would say, right now, we are way less mature of a society than we once were. This is not to say that immature people have not preceded us, but somewhere along the line, I believe we have opted for immaturity. It’s quite common for me to hear from my friends some phrase about not wanting to be responsible for someone (or something’s) well-being, or wanting to consider the emotional state of anyone outside of themselves. I listen, and I question: Is my generation the detriment of society by being unwilling to accept our positions as adults and the responsibility that comes with it?

Can maturity compete with our Burger King, “Have it Your Way,” motto society? Can it compete with the constant dopamine hits available from social media and substances? Can maturity compete with generations of people who no longer want to be responsible for others, and would rather nurse their neglect and abandonment wounds by remaining in Never-Never Land?

While arguments will come that our society and previous generations’ economic choices are leading us into this state of regression, I would argue it’s our lack of responsibility to our fellow man that will keep us forever stuck. This week, evaluate an area of your life where you know you need to mature, and consider the steps you need to take in order to get there – perhaps in your development of a plan, you’ll reach the first state of maturity: Not blaming others for your life choices.

A Prayer

Father God,

Thank you for the opportunity you give me every day to put away the childish things that seek to hold me back from my full spiritual development. Lord, I ask you for the wisdom to understand the areas of my life where I need to mature and develop a sense of responsibility to hold myself accountable for my mistakes, and to not blame others for my pitfalls. May you continue to order my steps and help me discern right from wrong, as I seek to deepen my relationship with you and others.

In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Mood Music

What is adulting if we don’t take a moment to laugh about the things that would generally make us cry? I would like to offer you all this upbeat feel-good throwback that reminds us about the part of adulthood where we work, pay bills, and are generally responsible over the people we’ve created.

Until Tomorrow.

Jam Session – Friday, June 10, 2022

Clarity and Compromise

There can be times when we feel like someone is interfering on our plans – the boss that tells you no to your PTO, the friend that jumps on your vacation plans, that annoying coworker who keeps stopping by your desk to discuss the same fight she has every morning with her kids, the dog that just pooped the house when you’re already 5 minutes late to work….

The list is endless! I’m even certain that you came up with your own scenarios as well. In all of these situations, I want you to remember that no one is doing anything to you. It takes courage to be clear and upfront about your desires, and it takes compassionate understanding to compromise. Both will help remove you from the stuck feeling that things are happening to you, and will give you back the autonomy to make informed-choices.

To the boss that tells you no to your PTO: I’ve been feeling burnt-out lately, and will be taking the space to relax. How might I be able to support you before I leave for vacation?

The friend that jumps on your vacation plans: I planned this as a solo experience, but if you’d like, I encourage you to plan a gathering for us, and I’ll let you know if it works for me.

That annoying coworker who keeps stopping by your desk to discuss the same fight she has every morning with her kids: I’m sorry you’re going through it right now. I really need to complete my work right now, but let’s sit together at lunch for 10 minutes and think through a game plan, because that seems to happen often.

The dog that just pooped the house when you’re already 5 minutes late to work: Hey, I’m really sorry I am running late. My dog had an accident, and I need to get them settled. Would you let my client know I’m running 10 minutes late?

It takes nothing to be kind and consider you may be inconveniencing those you love with your demands. Everyone grows at their own pace. Invite clarity and compromise into your next difficult conversation, and you will invite truth and peace into the relationship.

A Prayer

Father God,

Thank you for blessing me with the free will to be able to make the best decisions for myself in the moment, and thank you for the wisdom and guidance through your word. Lord, help me to approach difficult conversations with truth, honesty, and clarity, and bless me to be receptive when others are expressing views that go against my needs in the moment. Give me your strength to not take those moments personally, and to work best to find a compromise when necessary.

In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Mood Music

There’s no way that we can work it out
If we don’t pull together
I don’t mean to be demanding
I want some understanding

This song helps me address the point that some issues do not require compromise, they require an ending. If you feel you have done all that you could, and there’s no more, then allow space and time to do the rest. Don’t burn yourself trying to keep you both warm.

Until Monday.